Dream Planet

So maybe I don't live in the real world.
Where one's foolish mistakes from the young age,
are used to evaluate the adult that's striving to live in peace.

Maybe we should all be judges of each other's past.
Be eager to catch honest discrepancies or flaws in one's speech.
A year or two or maybe more that I missed, simply because I under-counted
what to me were back in day time, that I shall only look back at to recall the
good memories.

Maybe, I should count every letter before I from the heart share my moments.
Maybe, just maybe I should doubt.
Maybe, I should doubt every word, and info, and...and every feeling and moments
shared with me or pertains to me. Because, apparently we don't simply love each other's souls
with all that it comes with from joy, experience and agony.

I thought we don't choose who we let our hearts follow.
But maybe we should filter, maybe we shouldn't share
and maybe, just maybe I should return to the bubble
My dream bubble where I hide from the world to feel free to from my heart smile

Kind ones are for each other, but what's kind? and who's kind?
Are you kind because you smile?
Are you kind because you state that you are kind?

And when did kind become an insult?
when did it become a flaw? or  a point of weakness?

Why can't we just let go of all the tedious regulations
that forces our hearts to hide behind windows so afraid
of finding those who make it dance?

Maybe I should find another planet where I could be me
where me isn't haunted by whys and Qs.
where I could freely be a human, that has flaws
and a heart that could beat
and an imagination that could paint with blue and black
without being judged of being too dark or too shady

To my dream planet, away from this that's populated by ones that claim to be humans
dying to be portrayed as angels.

I'm not an angel, and I'm not striving to be one
I'm just a human, striving to be a good one
One that could dream, love and fall
then try to come back up
one that won't be afraid of failing
because failing is learning

but here, here failing is a laughable matter
and those who fail are to be avoided
are to be chased out.
out to where?
not sure, but I don't want to be here or there.
I simply desire to flee this space and catch the first cloud
headed to my dream planet to live in peace.

S..Love
01/14/2015

When he finally made up his mind!

She turned around to face he who tapped her shoulder...
would you dance with me? That was the only thing she heard from him before she sank in her memories.
She was sitting on the grass when he sat in front of her with his hand extended out to reach her's. "would you dance with me?"
Holding her hands and dancing was like a dream, it was her first dance ever! Heart is bouncing, eyes can't describe what she's feeling! Time passed by so quick, its 2 am and they are still dancing looking at each other in disbelieve.
Things went on so quick, to her she was the happiest, as for him, by time he realized what he was putting himself into. A relationship? responsibility? Someone who's far away!!! how did I let that happen?
So many issues in her life, his existence in her life was a bless, as she always thought about him whenever she faced an obstacle in her life-though he lived continents away- just the thought of him brought her happiness.
few months later things got a bit complicated in her life, and she let her problems get to her in a minute, that's when the table was flipped on her, and she didn't realize that by sharing her inner thoughts with him she was ending it all!
When she needed him to stand by her, is when he let go of her! At some point she thought that made herself clear, when she said I'd wait for you and stand by you at all times. She tried to hold on, for along time she waited and lived on very few memories they once shared! Was that 3 or 4 years ago!
She finally took a decision to let go of he who was relieved by walking on her. She lived with pain for years, hoping he would just look back at a good memory they had in a very short time! or a good feeling they shared! She never received any respond back, not even a thank you for a birthday gift, she handmade for him!!!
So many memories and thoughts went through her head the second she saw him.
Do I know you? That was her response to the one who she put her life on hold waiting for.
When he finally realized how he felt for her, it was just about time for her to move on and start a new life with a real person, who valued her heart.
------------------------------------------------------------------------

You can only do so much to keep the person you want in your life. Being honest and freely sharing all your thoughts and feelings with him or her is the purpose behind any relationship! If we can't keep our chests wide and hearts open for those who we care for, then what's the point!

Time is too short.

Because of this heart of mine: No regrets...

Because of this heart of mine: No regrets...: To the friend who walked on my heart, when I mostly needed her To the friend who I tightly held on to, while she looked away from me alon...

No regrets...

To the friend who walked on my heart, when I mostly needed her
To the friend who I tightly held on to, while she looked away from me
along time ago, she forgot about me, for years and years my heart was a witness
to the pain I endured, from whom I considered the closest to me
Today she came back asking me, whether or not I can hold her hand throughout her day..
To her I say, here's my response to you
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

you walked away with your own decision
never looked back or reconsidered
the friend I am never asked why or whatsoever
I only held on but never went better
I tried and tried
but who cared
if all you said was so what and whatever
I took my time, and the wind blew you away off my heart
and never looked back on a memory we once shared together
I closed my book on that page
and threw it in the middle of the ocean
never till now thought what happened to the book
that kept me and you in it together, but not forever
in a set of pictures
and what used to be a stack of endless priceless memories
years went on and I've moved on
for you to come today and say where are you
for you to look back, and ask "would you reconsider me?"
to actually think back, think that I kept you in my heart all that time!
after what you've done?
all i can say is that I forgive you
but more than that I'm glad that you no longer engage that place in me
and that my heart no longer belongs to you
you ripped my heart apart and never thought once, how I am doing
or what went wrong!
Today you look back to the friend you pushed away
without any doubt I turn around and say go to where you ran to be
to start a whole new life without me
here, right in the same place I stood before
wishing to see you happy one day..
now I see my wish coming true
and without being sorry, I now tell you
hey you might want me to reconsider, and whatsoever,
but let me before you take a decision,
share my current feelings with you
I have reached that level that I sought forever
where I have no regrets and I don't care
whether or not, you come back or never recall my name forever.. .

Because of this heart of mine: Lost in your own thoughts

Because of this heart of mine: Lost in your own thoughts: B eing lost within your own self is just not the best feeling that you can actually live. When you let yourself reach that deep stage, where...

Lost in your own thoughts

Being lost within your own self is just not the best feeling that you can actually live. When you let yourself reach that deep stage, where you no longer understand yourself, and what's that you need to do, just to get back to your own stable emotions.

It's all that confusion that you get, all the mixed up feelings, the anger, the pain when you see the injustice is replacing all types of flowers and smiles in the world. That feeling that dis-attach you from all kind of affiliation with what surrounds you, just for the fact that you feel short handed and can't provide fairness or justice to stop the farce that's been destroying the human race and all kind of beauty in our world.

Uncontrollable pain, that can't be identified, described, or located. 

Simply lost in random thoughts and feelings that can't be related at times, or awesomely connected as a web!